Letters to a Dead Man
by L.C. Li
Summary: Gogo writes letters to Tadashi and leaves them on his grave. But there's no way she'd ever get a reply. Right? — Tadashi:Gogo.


**_(a/n: my denial is strong.)_**

* * *

**Letters to a Dead Man_  
_**_by l__.c. li_

_Day 36._

Hey. You. Goody Two-Shoes.

Yeah, it's been a while. Gotta be honest, I couldn't really have anything to do with you for the past few weeks. Not talking about you, not visiting you, not... well, anything, really. I know, I'm a disrespectful jerk. Should've brought some flowers today, too, but you know how I suck at picking colors or anything remotely artistic. So I just brought this. And myself.

So, there's a lot of things I want to tell you, but I guess I'll hold off on those. Nothing's worse than running out of topics too early in a conversation. Or... you know, not going to the conversation in the first place. Which is what you're doing. Just saying.

Last note: Hiro's been handling it pretty poorly. Won't eat, won't sleep. Not sure what to do about it, if I can do anything at all. So come back soon. If you can. Okay, that was ridiculous. I'll just shut up. Like, right now.

Gogo Tomago

::-::

_Day 43._

Have a 4-hour break between classes this semester, so I figured, eh, why not. It's not like I have anything else to do.

...That was a total lie. I have three papers and a BRIDGE project due by next week. You know how the profs don't pull any punches at the beginning of the year. But, hey. I told them that I had a friend who was too lazy to get out of his coffin, so they're cutting me some slack.

So, Goody Two-Shoes. How're you doing? You haunting some old house around here? Sleeping through the afternoon? Or just hovering around Hiro like a creeper? I gotta admit, the amount of time you spent worrying over the kid made me jeal... amused. But I get it, you know. He's your brother. And you guys only really have each other. Had each other, I mean. There was Aunt Cass, but she was never part of the equation, was she? Just like m... all of us.

Gotta go. Class soon. I've got Dr. Alembragner again. And yes, he's still wearing those awful Hawaiian prints. I'm no Honey Lemon, but I can honestly say that I would burn those shirts if I ever got the chance.

Gogo Tomago

::-::

_Day 50._

Got you some flowers, finally. I don't know what kind they are. They're yellow. And fat. And I don't know, they look like the sun to me, and you always reminded me of the sun. Annoyingly bright. Burned my eyes. And searingly hot. ...Wait. No, not in _that_...

I gotta go.

Gogo Tomago

::-::

_Day 58._

Guess what. I got an A on my paper. My _research_ paper.

I know, say it isn't so. I actually _went to the library_. And _looked up sources_. And wrote over the _minimum length_. What's wrong with me, you ask? What have you done with the Gogo Tomago I know, you ask?

Dunno. I realize I tend to work harder when I'd rather not think about y... things. Wasabi calls it escapism. Fred calls it the flu. Honey calls it lo...

So. Brought you more flowers. The yellow ones. I learned what they were called this time, at least. Yellow chrysanthemums. That's a stupidly complicated name for obnoxiously bright flowers. Just like Tadashi is a stupidly complicated name for an obnoxiously...

Never mind.

Gogo Tomago

::-::

_Day 62._

I TAKE THOSE FLOWERS BACK I TAKE ALL OF THEM BACK

::-::

_Day 70._

Well. I'm back. What did I tell you, I suck at flowers. So I brought you something more interesting. And less embarr...

It's a box of kimchi. Stupid, I know. But you always tried to steal it. Even when I was eating it. Rude.

Anyways, I made an extra batch this time. Thought you might enjoy it, wherever you are. Made it extra spicy, just for you. Kidding, I know how you're terrible with spicy food. Which is ironic, given that you kept trying to steal my kimchi. What did you think it was, candy?

Gogo Tomago

::-::

_Day 73._

Honey says that you didn't try to steal the kimchi because of the kimchi, but because of me.

I don't know what that means.

Gogo Tomago

::-::

_Day 78._

Tadashi, can't you just

I wish you would

I can't

I miss

I hate you. You suck.

Gogo Tomago

::-::

_Day 86._

Electromag wheels are finally working. Thanks to little Whiz Kid. I don't think you'd approve of how I'm using them, though. Or how Whiz Kid is using Baymax.

Whatever. If you care so much, you'd come yourself and give us a talking-to.

Gogo Tomago

::-::

_Day 94._

Well, just saved the world today. No biggie.

You must be proud of Hiro. He's grown up. Almost killed Callaghan, but stopped just in time. Gotta be honest, a tiny part of me wished he'd gone through with it. Honey's the nice one—she actually removed the chip. I couldn't bring myself to do it.

I think... I think this might be my last letter. I learned a lot, Goody Two-Shoes. From Hiro. From Baymax. From Callaghan. It's... time to move on. You're not coming back. I need to accept that.

Rest up, Tadashi. You're in for one hell of a beating when I join you. So that peace and happiness of yours? Relish it. It'll be gone in 70 years.

Gogo Tomago

::-::

_Day 120._

To whoever stole my letters: Run. Now. Because when I find you, I _will_ kill you.

Gogo Tomago

::-::

_Day 121._

You think you're sneaky, don't you?

Gogo Tomago

::-::

_Day 122._

Psst. I'm right behind you.

Gogo Tomago

::-::

_Day 123._

You're smarter than you look. I'll give you that much.

Gogo Tomago

::-::

_Day 124._

Stealing my letters is one thing. Pretending to be someone else is another.

I was thinking of letting you off easy, but that's not happening anymore. You don't know what you just did.

Gogo Tomago

::-::

_Day 125._

WHAT THE HELL, TADASHI.

IF YOU'RE NOT HERE WHEN I COME TOMORROW, YOU'RE SCREWED. YOU'RE DEAD MEAT. YOU'RE

::-::

_Day 127._

So. Tadashi. And I'm calling you Tadashi, because you're not a Goody Two-Shoes. At all. You're the meanest, stupidest, most sadistic imbecile in the history of...

Okay. Look, I don't know when you'll read this. You never mentioned when you were coming back.

Which, by the way, _seriously_, Tadashi? Kissing me, then whispering, _I'm sorry, I'll be back soon, I promise_—how much more cliche can you get? Stop watching those dramas. They're rubbing off on you. Seriously, I don't think I've ever gone through anything more cheesy and stupid and beaut...

Okay, look, the least you could've done is take it easy. I'm still, you know, trying to process that you aren't a bunch of _ashes_ in the ground beneath my feet.

I'll be here tomorrow, same time. If you happen to see this. I don't know what you're up to, but don't give me any crap about _I can't tell you, it's too dangerous for you, I need to do this alone_. Because let me tell you, I just pulled a street race in a minivan, withstood what was essentially a black hole, and fought a microbot monster on rollerskates. I think I can handle whatever you throw at me.

So woman up.

Gogo Tomago

::-::

_Day 128._

Still not here. As usual. You know, I just realized that you were always late. Late to classes, late to parties, late to everything.

If you only you had been late to saving...

Where are you? I need to see...

Look, at the very least, tell Hiro. He deserves to know. No, he _needs_ to know.

There's so many questions. _Please_.

Gogo Tomago

::-::

_Day 129._

Okay, if you're not gonna come, at least leave me a note. Like, why aren't you even hurt? We saw you run into the building. We saw it explode.

And why did you choose _now_ to show up? Why not earlier? Or never? Why the heck are you dressed in that ridiculous black cape like some kind of vigilante? Trying to look cool? Sure, it's probably because you need to save the world... but can't you tell me why?

You said you suspected Callaghan during the fair. Why didn't you do anything? Why didn't you tell anyone? Does Callaghan have anything to do with your absence?

How did you dodge Baymax's sensors? How did you block his DNA scans over the city? Why did you do it in the first place?

And why did you kiss m...

Just... _answers. _I need answers. _We _need answers. Please.

Gogo Tomago

::-::

_Day 132._

Better be happy that Whiz Kid's got such a big brain. Idiot. You should know that you don't have to do this alone.

We're coming after you.

Gogo Tomago

::-::

_Day 202._

Hey, the tech ring's taken care of. And we know the whole CIA thing. There's no reason to avoid us anymore.

Ethel Kim

::-::

_Day 204._

Hiro and Honey have just informed me that you're talking to _them_, but not me.

Look, if you have something to say, say it to my face. Avoiding is stupid. And childish.

Ethel Kim

::-::

_Day 205._

Oh.

You know, there's always the possibility that your feelings aren't... you know, unrequited?

Ethel Kim

::-::

_Day 206._

Well, no, I was just saying, hypothetically, there's the possibility, that is, in an alternate universe, or in this one. Maybe. Possibly.

Ethel Kim

::-::

_Day 207._

Just putting it out there, but you kind of already kissed me.

In case you forgot. Which would be rude, since I can't stop thinking ab...

Look, just get over here tomorrow. I have something to tell you.

Ethel Kim

::-::

_Day 26,698._

My last letter to you, Tadashi. For good. But that's okay, because I know I'll see you soon.

What could possibly be the last words of a senile, old woman? I'm not sure. But I think I'll just say one last thing before I pass on: Thanks.

Thanks for being so kind, so gentle, so selfless. You were pretty much an angel.

Thanks for the memories. Both ups and downs. I wouldn't have traded those experiences for anything.

Thanks for keeping life interesting. I guess that tends to happen when a couple is comprised of two undercover CIA agents, but still. In some ways, the more interesting nights were the ones with spontaneous candlelight dinners and motorcycle races and just fiddling around the SFIT lab like old times.

Thanks for making me wear a traditional wedding dress. I know I complained about it every step of the way, but to be honest, I liked dressing up. Just once, though. Never again.

Thanks for forcing me to take vitamins every day. Except the molybdenum ones. Those were stupid. Neither of us were deficient of molybdenum.

Thanks for adopting Jack. That poor kid. I don't know what the CIA was thinking, making a 9-year-old orphan into an agent.

Thanks for passing in peace. I'm glad that you didn't have to die on the field with a bullet in your stomach, but that you died in the hospital after a long, meaningful life.

Thanks for waiting for me, as I know you must be doing. You're good at waiting.

And thanks for that day those many, many years ago, when I said I'd stop writing to you, and you decided you couldn't bear it if that happened.

I'm coming soon, Tadashi. Thanks for everything.

Love,  
Ethel Hamada

_fin_


End file.
